Friends from work welcomed a new baby boy early this morning. Of course, every time a new baby makes an appearance on the periphery of one’s life, it causes one to sit back, reminisce, and then assault the new parents with a litany of advice and rules (most of which we rolled our eyes at […]
Parenting (Or a Lack Thereof)
Mother’s Day 2017
Happy Mother’s Day to all the ladies out there who answer to the name “Mom” (also “Mommy”, “Momma”, “Ma”, and sometimes, “Worst Mom EVER!!!!”). For all of you who have stumbled from the warm cocoon of your blankets at all hours of the night to chase away bad dreams, feed hungry babies, change the […]
Tráeme Una Cerveza Now, Punk!
As a parent I’ve done one thing right over the past year. Well, maybe there were…well, there was the time when…wait, no…yeah, just the one thing. Anyway, I did one thing right. We were faced with an upheaval with regards to the kids’ school. One was going to be going to middle school, one going […]
Karma’s a Bitch With a Needle
We all go through phases in our lives and I’ve been through my fair share. There was the new wave/punk phase, the “experiment with everything my parents hate” phase, the “This is FlyBoy and I LUV him” phase (which coincidentally occurred in the height of the “experiment with everything my parents hate” phase). Not all […]
Why Doesn’t Anyone Take Ca$h Anymore?
There are so many cyclical events in my life–and they all seem to involve the almighty dollar. Either I’m shelling out the cash or involved in some scheme to reel it in on behalf of some entity. Right now, we are in the middle of Little League season. Since Day 1 of practice I’ve had […]
In the Words of Van Halen: Go Ahead and Jump!
I (so, so, so) frequently find myself in the position where I think I am about to congratulate one of my spawn on a job well done, only to find out that their boisterous claims are really about something that’s going to make me go all Linda Blair on them. I try not to make […]
Drinking Games For The 10 and Under Crowd
One of the great things about Christmas is that there are still people out there who will save a kid the torture of an ugly sweater, a foreign-language biopic that “he’ll learn to appreciate later in life”, or a festively wrapped summer sausage and will just give ca$h! This year, with those kinds of people […]
Bad Parenting, or Just Clean Fun?
Certainly every parent out there has laughed at one of their children being tortured, right? No? Just me? Well, to make matters worse, not only am I laughing at the torture being inflicted upon The Oldest, I am also the proud mother of the perp, or as I like to call him: The Middle. To […]
If You Build It–AND Leave It Open 24 Hours a Day–They Will Come
I awoke to a beautiful site today. I opened the blinds of the kitchen window to find my new back yard covered in snow. There was a time in my life when I hated snow. I believe that time closely correlates with the time in my life that I realized that being “treated like an […]